Listen Up!

I multitask..doesn't every mother...but because of this, I think I may have a really short attention span. You see, I finished writing that sentence and then I stopped. What was I going to write after that? I am never really sure so then I make something else up and hope that I will remember what I was really going to say before everyone stops listening to me and walks away. It doesn’t always work.

In my family, if you stop to take a breath someone else starts talking and if you are like me you won’t remember what you wanted to say when they finally give you a chance to speak. I have three older children and a self-employed husband. They always have so much more to talk about than me it seems. Or maybe it is just that as a mother I have assumed the role of listener over the years.

I work from home, handling the administrative side of the business my husband and I have built up over the last 15 or so years. I have worked out of the home as well when the children were school aged but we have always had our business to run so I was never working full time away from the home. This has allowed me the privilege, although I sometimes may have questioned that description, to be here for everyone. I am here when someone needs a ride, when someone needs some food, or when someone needs an ear. Mostly, I am here, and they have all learned to count on that. Unfortunately, on the flip side, it seems to have taken away my ability to be anything but The Listener. I work alone all day and speak on the phone very rarely. When I do, I am listening to customers. When my family comes home, I am listening to them.

Here is how it typically plays out: Imagine a table at dinner, the food is home cooked and the house has been cleaned, the family sits around talking about their respective days. They all seem to be talking to me. Or maybe I just feel that way and I have the desire to listen to everyone talking. I try to listen to one, then the other, then another, now the first is clamoring for my attention again, “I didn’t finish”, throw in a parent or an in-law or two, they demand respect, oh dear, oh no, who was I listening to in the first place? I think you get the picture. See I maybe really do have a short attention span.

How do I treat this developed affliction? How do I get others to listen to me? Wait, I sound pathetic. When I attend a party or a get together at a friends’ home, they listen, they even tell me I am entertaining sometimes. I do get invited again so this is a good sign, right? Well then, what is the problem? Why is it that at home I am The Listener? I am fun, I am intelligent, I have things to say. Really.

Now my children will read this and end up saying “But sometimes you don’t listen. Sometimes you just LOOK like you are listening”.

Err, umm, yes, I do that too.

Remember I work from home and many a days I have been busy doing my work and the school bus arrives, the kids let themselves in, sit down in the empty chair near my desk that awaits there arrival and proceed to tell me about their day. I tried really hard to listen all those times but I really needed to finish what I was doing so I could make you all some supper!

Talk to me, then but wait for your sister to finish her story first.